The Top 3 Assumptions about Me (and why they’re aggy AF)
Image by Au Jus Creative
I’ve been sharing content from my pole journey online for a few years now on different social media accounts, and I’ve consistently seen these 3 themes in my comments. It seemed worth a blog post to share some perspective because I hate the idea of anybody counting themselves out before they even give things a fair try.
Folks assume that I’ve always been “strong enough” to pole.
Each person you see on your social media feed had a first attempt at pole dancing. It takes so much practice (and built-up strength) to make things look easy! Thinking that you’ll leave your first-ever lesson with the same experience as someone who has trained for years is totally unrealistic. Don’t let P. Valley get you caught up!
In my first-ever class, I couldn’t even get myself off of the ground for a basic climb. I had ZERO upper body strength. But something crazy happens the more you try. You get STRONGER, ya’ll. 4 weeks later, I was climbing and actually getting off of the ground. I haven’t looked back! I see so many people quit after one class because they aren’t immediately good at it, but guess what? You’ll continue not being good at it if you expect to be a 10/10 the first go round. There’s technique, repetition, finding your own dance style, etc. that all plays a role in what your unique dance journey will look like.
This last one should go without saying, but:
YOU WILL SWEAT.
YOU WILL FIND MYSTERY BRUISES.
YOU WILL BE SORE.
The more you dance, the more you’ll get stronger and figure out how to make it all look effortless. Just know that with pole you’ll never be in a situation where you’re not exerting yourself in order to complete any spins, tricks, or hell even walking around it for that matter.
People believe that I’ve always been able to move confidently (ESPECIALLY in heels).
I remember the first time I signed up for a pole class. My friend told me to purchase a pair of 7-inch Pleasers as my first heels because it would be easier to move up in heel height from there.
I couldn’t BELIEVE sis would say something like that to me! How the hell was I supposed to manage being 7 inches away from the floor and looking sexy at the same time?
Well, ya’ll…I learned by practicing and DOING. I’ve done some form of dance my whole life, so that aspect of moving came naturally to me. But the strutting, taking my TIME in slow movements to show my strength and control? That part only came by constantly practicing. I didn’t just wake up one day instantly good at anything. I set goals and I chipped away at them little by little. Now? I sometimes dance in 9 inch heels and I wonder who tf I even think I am some days.😅
Ya’ll assume that dancing for men is my motivation.
It ain’t. Not by a long shot.
I dance because I love the way that EYE look and move. If someone else appreciates that then good for them and their ability to tip accordingly. Dancing is one of few outlets I have that allows me to decompress and feel without having to cut through all the mental noise I’m wading through day in and day out. Every body roll, split, heel clack, booty clap is for ME FIRST. Anybody else comes second to that in my world.
Fun fact about that pole room you see on my Instagram? My husband built it after he saw how much dancing rounded out my spirit. The only time you’ll catch him in there is when we’re stretching together or working through a couple’s chair routine for the upcoming month. That room and extra closet for outfits and heels is all for me, and it’s a dedicated space for me to experiment and explore without any outside eyes unless I’ve invited them. If that ain’t love idk what is. 🤷🏾♀️
